Thursday, November 20, 2008

from mind

1st: i tried to focus on drawing a head in a particular expression and pose i had in mind. Tried to use what i had learnt yesterday and in the days before doing some head "studies". In the beginning i intended to do a portrait of Odin, lacking an eye, that´s why he´s got a pretty bad designed fake eye with not really defined things on the cheek bone=) But again i wasn´t focusing on design, i just wanted the head and the expression to feel right...i´m not sure i did though, some construction problems, and the position of the eye on the left really stand out.

2nd: i tried to focus on values and texture here, tried to give him different materials in the outfit and rnder them as i thought they should look like...the chest piece was supposed to be made of bones..the material at least =) head piece metal, cloth -> cloth, gun metal, the thing behind the back some kind of red ceramic, and the band across the chest of some kind of heavy cloth. The design is completely fucked up =) and that pissed me off a lot in the beginning, I intended to stop after 10 minutes of scribling on the paper, but i´m trying to work on my endurance, and bring stuff to completion, so i worked on it for 1 and a half hour more =) (2 hours for that crap??? =p but thats what i´m really thinking, even if i laugh now =) )

3rd: yesterday before going to sleep i was doodling, and i happened to have a face, so i tried to include in it, the 2 things i had learnt from the 2 drawings from photograf that i had previously done=) ehhe cool!

ok, i did 2 more from mind uhm....i´m having a hard time with beliefs...especially the one that says: "i suck as an artist, and i all i draw is crap" wich has got me from drawing the past 21 years of my life =)
I need to convince me to believe that i´m a great artist, but every time i try, i have this voice telling me: you suck!! xD ahahah it´s quite fun actually, untill i start drawing in this negative status and the drawing sucks, an then i say, ok, now i proved that i suck, let´s prove that i´m a great artist, and so i start to refine the picture untill it looks decent...i just need to skip the first part now...=) remove the belief that i suck...i´ll try to find a solution while sleeping, so tomorrow i´ll produce some mindblowing art =) really...i´m starting to realize that it´s all there, if i think i´ll do amazing art (most of the times because i see it in my mind) then i just sit down and do it, otherwise i just draw some marks, and start telling my self that it sucks, i´m not drawing everything, they look like scribbles, and the drawing is lost (usually this happens after 10 seconds, if i don´t start warning myself that i will draw random scribbles at the beginning untill i come with an idea)...if i start with the idea of producing something, without nowing what it is, and then of course failing at it, because i´m expecting to take the rabit out of the hat without having any rabit in it, i become negative and tired...uhm..nice...this sort of talking through my thoughts, is really helpfull to me...otherwise i would loose focus quite fast =)

i have some life drawings, i´ll try to put up tomorrow,

No comments: